To the people on the internet who want to “save” me,
I got your messages. I have read your comments. I have received your emails. Thank you for your concern. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your message telling me that you love my page and think that (insert product/diet/lifestyle here) will benefit me. I am assuming you saw PCOS in my name. Maybe you are unique and spent a minute looking at my page and saw I formally was an unhealthy weight. Or maybe you dug deeper like the little overachiever you are and noticed I have struggled with an eating disorder, depression, self hatred and anxiety. And while those things are a big part of me, it is not WHO I am.
I assume you have good intentions. I like to believe the best in people. I am sure you are not just trying to sell me a product. That would just be cruel using my perceived weaknesses as a sales pitch. I know you aren’t searching hashtags looking for vulnerable women to impose your opinions or products on. You must know better. I am positive your days are spent trying to better people by telling them how wrong they are for how they eat or what they wear or how they look.
I want to tell you that I don’t need saving. You may assume because I put myself out there on the internet, that I should be okay with you pushing your opinions on me. I can’t stop you. I have chosen to share my story and with that comes critique and unsolicited comments. I’m okay with that.
But for one second, I want you to think about yourself. I know, this must be hard since you are so selfless with the giving of your opinions. Imagine something you are insecure about. Something that hurts you. Your weak spot. Imagine working on that struggle every day. Imagine the tears and grief and sadness you have felt along with it. Hard right?
Now imagine overcoming it, or at the very least accepting it. Imagine growing into a point of accepting and sharing and loving your story. You are proud and strong and encouraged.
Then someone comes along and tells you you aren’t doing it right. Someone comes along and tells you it’s not enough. You aren’t worthy of feeling good because you aren’t as good as you could be.
It would hurt right? Maybe piss you off?
It is really hard to overcome your insecurities. It is even harder to share them with others and open yourself up to critique. It takes bravery to find your way in this world. I am so glad you found yours. It must be important to you since you feel the need to force your thoughts on strangers on the internet.
I am strong enough to not fall for what people try to sell me anymore- whether it is in the form of product that will “fix me” or words said to make me believe I am unworthy. But so many others are not. Your “concern” may just break them.
In the day of Dr. Google and online forums being replacements for medical and mental health advice, I understand everyone feels they are an expert. It’s easy to feel powerful and all knowing sitting behind a keyboard tapping away your beliefs and thoughts and imposing them on everyone. You may assume you understand me from looking at my page.
But you don’t know everything. Your opinion is just that. An opinion. Feel free to express it, but don’t impose it on others. Post it on your own wall, your blog, your diary, anything you own. But not on me. I am not an open forum because you can see my pictures on the internet.
I’m sure you are thinking, ” Well if you don’t like it why be so public on the internet?”
Touche, my friend. You are so smart. I could very well pack up my 695 pictures, my plethora of stories and tales and lock them away so I don’t open myself up to your opinions. But who would benefit? No one. I share my story to not only help others, but to help myself. I refuse to be stopped because you feel I am doing it wrong. For every one of you doubters or concerned followers, I have 10 that get who I am. They understand that behind the few characteristics you pulled from your skim of my page as weaknesses, are bad ass qualities that make me much more. I am smart. I am a fighter. I am empathetic. I am a believer in supporting and being kind to others. And I am not buying your bullsh*t.
So from the girl you see on my Instagram as someone to save, sell to, or correct- Thank you for your concern. I am so glad you took the time to let me know how much I need fixing. But the one fact you failed to see is that I don’t need saving. I am not broken.
A fabulously flawed women who fought hard to get where she is and knows that your opinions should be kept to yourself and will refrain from speaking hers about you.
Originally posted 2016-06-11 18:48:10.